Currently feeling So FUCKING angry. i wanna punch something, FUCK.
Fucking Jason, im so fucking pissed off. He can't even fucking take a joke. Holy shit, nice to have something stuck up your FUCKING ass. Fucking yelled at me and called me stupid because i pushed him. Okay, so what? You can't take a joke? You have to yell at me infront of your friends? Make shit awkward, not talk, and not even say bye? FUCK you. I'm officially pissed at myself for even pushing him now, cause all i wanted was his fucking attention. I'm a fucking idiot. He doesn't even ever talk to me when he's around his friends. And the only time i see him, is WHEN he's with his friends. So all i wanted was some fucking attention from the faggot. MY BAD, im fucking SORRY for MYSELF, for being stupid. I'm not sorry for him, i'm fucking sorry that i'm DUMB to fucking care. Fuck him. I'm done.

I dont need people like that in my life. This is the last time i'll ever cry over you. ever. I was stupid enough to wait out in the cold for him for so long too today. Because i wanted to see him, because i missed him & couldnt wait. i'm fucking sorry FOR BEING AN IDIOT. i swear, this will be the last time i ever cry over you. ever. 

Currently feeling all tired and sleepy - in&out.
So i've been back at work, and it's only been the second day! i feel sick of it already. my feet are killing me, and i'm absolutely EXHAUSTED!!! Can't believe i slave myself at work,, ugh! and as sad as i am, i MUST work all day tomorrow. must earn money, must work hard~!!! =)))

lately i feel as though him&i are drifting further and further apart. perhaps being friends should be better for us??? infact, i dont really mind it. there are however, times where i'd want to pick up my phone to call him, but i figure it's for the best. after all the disappointments, is there really any hope left? i'm almost at the verge of giving up. relationships can't be saved after so much trauma. we'll see how things go,, i'm pretty happy where i am right now though. stress-free robin~ lol,, kind of! So, off i go to sleep~! 

Currently feeling super duper moody
I'm so sleepy, yet somehow, i can't fall asleep. I have something on my mind, so i suppose i should let it out here. I hate people who give in to peer pressure so easily. I think that, that is the most unattractive aspect in a man. Like seriously? Why? Guys should do what they do, they shouldn't listen to their friends. Like eff that, i never listen to my friends when they tell me to do something, that i have doubts about. So annoying... but whatever. What floats your boat,,

So i finally finished exams, though not very excited. I'm afraid i've failed. Several courses, probably. The likelihood is fairly high O_O.. sighh. As for life? I don't know what i want anymore. Things are VERY on the VERGE of ending between him&i. Things are as bad as they are already, and today i saw him. From what i've been hearing, i'm not liking it one bit. Things are already as bad as they are, and now - hearing all this crap... doesn't put him in a better position either. It's true, a woman can't change a man. Better said, a woman can't change a man, if the love he has for her is insufficient. i'm on the verge right now, i dont think i can handle it anymore. i'm just going to live my life, fuck men. They need to learn how to fucking grow up at some point. I think my lifestyle is just too mature for them to handle. sickening...

Currently listening to: OLDSCHOOL Christina Aguilera - Fighter
So after writing my two exams today, i know that i've for sure failed. For some reason though, i feel LESS stress now that those two are over. What's done is done right? =) i'll just have to "work a little bit harder" next semester (quoting Christina Aguilera) lol. Guess that's why i'm feeling this song right now. I AM A FIGHTER, I AINT GON' STOP... MAKES ME THAT MUCH STRONGER, MAKES ME WORK A LITTLE BIT HARDER... THANKS FOR MAKING ME A FIGHTER.

Guess you could say i'm relating this song both to schoolwork and HIM. Let's not talk about that, ugh.. Anywho, one more exam, one more assignment, and im done!! Super excited for my one month break =)))

Currently feeling SO depressed so so depressed...
So i have 2 exams tmrw. One of which i am not attending, because there is no way i can pass, and the other? Well, i have to do very well, in order to pass the course, cause i didn't complete a 15% assignment. I'm so screwed in so many ways. i feel so depressed, i can't fucking get myself together to do this anymore. i feel like nothing is going right, and i regret so very much as to why i hadn't attended my classes all semester. I pray that i do well on atleast my INT exam tmrw to pass the course. I can't do anything about IBC now, but atleast let me pass INT. I really did learn my lesson, next semester im going to ALL of my classes, i will not miss a single class.

I've never felt more disappointed in myself, and i'm afraid i may be put on probation. everything sucks, i suck. i deserve it, i know. i just wish i could do well on tmrw's exam, im so afraid... i wish that SOMEONE, SOMETHING, SOMEHOW, ANYTHING can help me. but i know there isn't any use. i brought this all upon myself...

Currently feeling like the sky is falling down on me..
Upset. So i haven't been updating for months now. guess i've been busy with the boyfriend. well, nevermind. not so much boyfriend now. more like ex.

So i just broke up with him via text message. Super great huh. He's just as he was the day i found out he didnt want me to attend the cottage trip. It's just this time, the only reason he wants me to go to the wedding is cause he doesn't wanna pick a fight. It's funny, cause Tom invited me. Atleast Tom wanted me to go, and he's just a friend. My own boyfriend doesn't even want me to go. Haha. Sometimes i wonder why i even bother getting upset. I know how he is. So i guess, that's that. I'm sick of this. I know i say "Let's Breakup" a lot, but this time i really mean it. There's only so much one person can take. And this was my limit. Good thing i have a blog. this is the best thing ever,,

Currently feeling not up to par...
the worst feeling in the world is knowing that you're other half doesn't fucking love you. i don't care how many times the guy tells me it's not true,, if he's treating me the way he does, then clearly my intuition tells me otherwise... that's fine. he doesn't think it's gonna work out, that's fine. just don't talk to me anymore. that's fine too.

whatever, i dont care anymore... i need to stop putting myself down. ill find someone who'll truly love me. i don't fucking care anymore. he can go be with his friends. hope he's fucking happy about it. because he just lost the best girlfriend in the fucking world. truthfully... i just need a shoulder to let my feelings out right now... one day ill meet somebody who'll treat me the way im to be treated..

Currently feeling lost in action & speech
So i haven't been here in awhile! rawrr, i've been busy working and going back to school! What a great two weeks summer off huh~! lol.. So let's update! Lately, i've been feeling as though him&i are drifting further & further apart.. it's as though i don't even know who he is anymore. i feel as though everything that comes out of his mouth is to tease me & that everything he says are all lies. I hate to feel that way just because i trust him the most out of everyone. With this barrier, & how much of a stranger he is to me now, i can't help but not feel the same love towards him as i once did.

there were just too many disappointments, one after the other.. & everything tells me that he's just not that into me. i can't seem to accept that JUST yet though. i guess deep down, i still hope that one day he'll love me the same way, but really robin??? that's not gon' happen! Right now though, i'm pretty busy, so i don't pay much attention to things between us. guess it's better that way~

Currently still breaking out in hivesssss
so lately i've been feeling depressed. i guess you could say it's due to many things, but most importantly, i think smoking all the weed & drinking the other day just fucked shit up. they are depressants after all... whatever. On another note, lately i feel as though i don't even have a boyfriend. the guy doesn't even have TIME to spend with me. When i say me, i mean, not with a crapload of his other friends. WHICH ACTUALLY, i don't mind doing, but it's the fact that WE (me&him) don't even do our own thing anymore. How can he not have time for me, when he doesn't even have to do anything? i'm the fucking busy one. & when we're supposed to get together to do something, he lags like there's no tomorrow.

i just want a guy who could lift me off my feet =) ...like surprise me now & then (not necessarily with material things), or even just take me OUT on an actual date. everytime we meet up its like, "so what do you want to do?".... "i don't know, you pick..."... ugh!! drives me nuts. i'm a girl, & i need some fucking romance in my life!!! fuck myLIFE. fuckYOU mister HIVES... lets out a big sigh.

Currently feeling UBER sick with snot coming down...
So.. i didn't attend my last exam today. I guess it's for the better because i NEED to know how to do CL, RPG, DDS programming before i move onto the next course. i'm just disappointed that i now have to repeat two courses. OOP & IBC... but it's okay!!! i'm definitely going to do better this semester. i can't let this happen again, because this definitely was truly a disappointment on my part. why? because i KNOW that im smarter than that. i just need to get my act together. uhhhh,,

on another note, i'm still extremely sick & feel like crap. things suck like that... but i'm soSO motivated to do better next semester. come on robin, you can do it~~!! ^_^